In lieu with the recent development in the latest controversy facing PGMA, will history, for the nth time, repeat itself?
What will happen next?
Will an impeachment complaint be filed in the House of Representative, resulting into an impeachment trial in the Senate? Will it prosper? Will PGMA be found guilty? If and when it & she does, could the people, or majority at least, accept the ascendancy of her rightful, constitutional heir? But of course, in the same way since de castro belongs to the same party, he will be brought to close scrutiny as well.
Or will there be a military junta, with the arm forces seizing power to establish a military, authoritarian government? But, will they leave their president? Or will there be another mass revolt to forcefully oust GMA? And after, will a revolutionary government be established, initiated by the united opposition, different sectors of society, and civil society?
Or with the forthcoming intense public pressure, will the president call for a snap election, step down from office, or both?
Or will there be a conspiracy between the military and the sectoral groups, like plotted earlier this year?
Too many questions, varying speculations, and just a tiny spark will ignite a collapse and much worse, another downgrade in the economy and in Philippine democratization.
In the midst of the recurring issue, and whatever its consequences will, be it in favor or not to the present regime, what is apparent is that the president committed a betrayal of public trust, entrenched further by her admission today.
Trust. It is the glue that bond any relationship. Given hypothetically that she stays in power, will she be able to impose her will, and establish a 'strong-state' to preserve her government, knowing that most of the people seems to hold no more to that bond?
Betrayal. Constitutionally, it is culpable violation and ground for impeachment. But culturally, in the Filipino psycho-social make-up, it is forgivable.Hence, another chance.
-----
Betrayal.
I hate it when I trample upon other's feelings. It makes me hate myself more. And I am left only with the words 'sorry,' which until now I still keep to myself.
I am talking about the groupings for research writing (thesis). Somewhere along the course of groupmate selection, I did not choose lucky and I asked joyce to drop me. I opted to choose another group.
It was a rational decision, I admit. Rational in a rational theory's sense. That being: choices are made based upon one's self-interest.
It pains me that it has to be a turning point. I feel I betrayed them.
Betrayal. GMA is guilty. I am guilty.
Monday, June 27, 2005
Saturday, June 25, 2005
Umaga. Maaga. Ang Aga.
maaga. maaga akong nagising at gumayak para sa eskwelahan. alas-siete pa lang gising na ako sapagkat marami pang bagay na dapat ayusin - ang pinagtulugan, ang uniporme at ang almusal.
maaga. maaga akong natapos. pasado alas-otso, nakuha ko pang basahin ang ilang pahina ng babasahin sa environmental politics at kaunting pahina ng warrior of the light ni paolo coehlo habang nakatutok sa aircon at naghihintay ng oras.
maaga. maaga akong pumasok, labinlimang minuto bago mag alas-nuebe ay binaybay ko na ang kalsadang may halos apat na taon at ilan libong beses ko na ring nilalakaran. nakakapagod.
maaga. maaga akong dumating sa st. raymund's building, alas-nuebe en punto ay papasok na ako sa loob. sinalubong ako ng isang kapwa estudyante sa agham pampulitika, at sinabing "'bat andito ka? wala kayong pasok ngayong umaga. wala si martin." sinabi ko pang hindi naman kami martin ngayong umaga eh, environmental politics. 'yun pala ang asignatura ng klase nila. napahiya pa ako. hindi na lang sana ako nagsalita.
bakit walang nag-text sa 'kin? bakit hindi ko alam? kung nalaman ko ng mas maaga, hindi sana ako nagpagod. marahil natutulog pa ako ng mahimbing sa aking kama. ang sarap pa naman matulog dahil malamig ang panahon.
siguro dapat itapon ko na yun sim ko ng sun at bumili ng globe o smart para mai-chikka text ako ni ate marianne. subalit, paano ko naman gagamitin yun eh celphone nga wala pa ako at nakikigamit lang. bwisit kasi yung julie na yun eh, hanggang ngayon hindi pa binabalik yung phone ko.
maaga. umaga. kabit-kabit na pangyayari. dugtong-dugtong na kabanata ng nakalipas. asar, ayoko ng pumasok ng maaga.
maaga. maaga akong natapos. pasado alas-otso, nakuha ko pang basahin ang ilang pahina ng babasahin sa environmental politics at kaunting pahina ng warrior of the light ni paolo coehlo habang nakatutok sa aircon at naghihintay ng oras.
maaga. maaga akong pumasok, labinlimang minuto bago mag alas-nuebe ay binaybay ko na ang kalsadang may halos apat na taon at ilan libong beses ko na ring nilalakaran. nakakapagod.
maaga. maaga akong dumating sa st. raymund's building, alas-nuebe en punto ay papasok na ako sa loob. sinalubong ako ng isang kapwa estudyante sa agham pampulitika, at sinabing "'bat andito ka? wala kayong pasok ngayong umaga. wala si martin." sinabi ko pang hindi naman kami martin ngayong umaga eh, environmental politics. 'yun pala ang asignatura ng klase nila. napahiya pa ako. hindi na lang sana ako nagsalita.
bakit walang nag-text sa 'kin? bakit hindi ko alam? kung nalaman ko ng mas maaga, hindi sana ako nagpagod. marahil natutulog pa ako ng mahimbing sa aking kama. ang sarap pa naman matulog dahil malamig ang panahon.
siguro dapat itapon ko na yun sim ko ng sun at bumili ng globe o smart para mai-chikka text ako ni ate marianne. subalit, paano ko naman gagamitin yun eh celphone nga wala pa ako at nakikigamit lang. bwisit kasi yung julie na yun eh, hanggang ngayon hindi pa binabalik yung phone ko.
maaga. umaga. kabit-kabit na pangyayari. dugtong-dugtong na kabanata ng nakalipas. asar, ayoko ng pumasok ng maaga.
Friday, June 24, 2005
And I Enrolled.
School year opened last week. And I enrolled last Tuesday. It thus follows that I have been absent from class for almost a week. And every one thought I'd quit school. Funny. I almost did.And my friends knew it. I really appreciate their efforts and concern convincing me all this time to drop the idea. Lyra and Mannilyn dropped by the house last Monday. I was in Ortigas, though. The next day I found out Prof Tayao was about to talk to me. I feel important. I made the right choice of keeping these people. But I am saddened. I feel pa-importante, contrary to the fact that it wasn't my intention to put them into my life's mess. I am saddened for I cannot remunerate their efforts and concern. Less, I tried. Someday, I will. By the time I finally dropped the idea and enrolled, I immediately felt the burden and responsibility of having to triple, quadruple my efforts. I am prepared for the upcoming rigors, mentally, at least; emotionally, i have yet to.
Tuesday. One class, SEM1. Prof. Hornedo was great! He was inspiring, more than being incredible. He talks superb. The experiences he had, the wisdom he gained over the years were apparent in the things he shared. A feat achieved beyond the rigors of a pedagogic life.Prof. Hornedo discussed the poor and deteriorating education in the Philippines. The problem is getting more than serious, or should I say it has already become malignant that it will take another century to refurbish it totally. The figure of illiteracy rates increases exponentially, while passing rate decreases from 70 percent to 30 percent.
Wednesday. Exhausting. I was very tired when I got home. I stayed in UST for more than 12 hours. I woke up early for Freshmen Tour. Hmm, another batch of varying potentials – struggling their way in college, trying to get the best education there is in this country (how I wish!) only to serve other’s asses later in life; all in the name of living, cosmopolitan. Is there any other way? There is none. One way or another, industrialization, capitalism and now, globalization have penetrated each man’s soul. The world has grown too materialistic.
I had two three-hour classes later in the afternoon: democratic theory, and land reform and taxation. Thank god! No recitations yet for Prof Tayao. But darn, I didn’t ask any question. I read ahead but I couldn’t come up with a sensible inquiry. Still the same Prof Galang. The class had a not-so-heated debate on issue about the House hearing on the “wiretapped” conversation of a woman allegedly PGMA and a COMELEC Commissioner who is said to be Comm. Garcillano, manipulating the results of 2004 Elections.In my opinion: the discussion over the house rules is relevant, but to take the joint-committees for more than two hours on the discussion of house rules alone is unreasonable. And all appears to be a tactic for delay. I never stood.
Tuesday. One class, SEM1. Prof. Hornedo was great! He was inspiring, more than being incredible. He talks superb. The experiences he had, the wisdom he gained over the years were apparent in the things he shared. A feat achieved beyond the rigors of a pedagogic life.Prof. Hornedo discussed the poor and deteriorating education in the Philippines. The problem is getting more than serious, or should I say it has already become malignant that it will take another century to refurbish it totally. The figure of illiteracy rates increases exponentially, while passing rate decreases from 70 percent to 30 percent.
Wednesday. Exhausting. I was very tired when I got home. I stayed in UST for more than 12 hours. I woke up early for Freshmen Tour. Hmm, another batch of varying potentials – struggling their way in college, trying to get the best education there is in this country (how I wish!) only to serve other’s asses later in life; all in the name of living, cosmopolitan. Is there any other way? There is none. One way or another, industrialization, capitalism and now, globalization have penetrated each man’s soul. The world has grown too materialistic.
I had two three-hour classes later in the afternoon: democratic theory, and land reform and taxation. Thank god! No recitations yet for Prof Tayao. But darn, I didn’t ask any question. I read ahead but I couldn’t come up with a sensible inquiry. Still the same Prof Galang. The class had a not-so-heated debate on issue about the House hearing on the “wiretapped” conversation of a woman allegedly PGMA and a COMELEC Commissioner who is said to be Comm. Garcillano, manipulating the results of 2004 Elections.In my opinion: the discussion over the house rules is relevant, but to take the joint-committees for more than two hours on the discussion of house rules alone is unreasonable. And all appears to be a tactic for delay. I never stood.
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
VERTIGO.
Vision of a blurred firmament,
escaping the dark ironies of life
shelved almost constantly in paradox
of an intellectual struggle
between faith and reason.
Of Struggle—
deep and profound,
extracting until it reaches the end
unearthing the innermost core,
the subzero terrain.
The Answers—
sought ad infinitum,
obscured by the mores of the wicked clothed in white,
undiscerned, remained volatile
and incomprehensible to the intellect of man.
Of Man—
who is created by a god in his image and likeness,
or who created a god in his image and likeness.
Explanations from a
Temporal world—
of corporeal substance and material longing,
of ephemeral pleasure and momentary satisfaction,
of climactic means and orgasmic ends.
The mind yearns for the unifying essence.
Struggling with life’s ultimate paradox:
to answer what seemed unanswerable.
Trying to grasp the absolute,
and to encapsulate the meaning of life and living.
escaping the dark ironies of life
shelved almost constantly in paradox
of an intellectual struggle
between faith and reason.
Of Struggle—
deep and profound,
extracting until it reaches the end
unearthing the innermost core,
the subzero terrain.
The Answers—
sought ad infinitum,
obscured by the mores of the wicked clothed in white,
undiscerned, remained volatile
and incomprehensible to the intellect of man.
Of Man—
who is created by a god in his image and likeness,
or who created a god in his image and likeness.
Explanations from a
Temporal world—
of corporeal substance and material longing,
of ephemeral pleasure and momentary satisfaction,
of climactic means and orgasmic ends.
The mind yearns for the unifying essence.
Struggling with life’s ultimate paradox:
to answer what seemed unanswerable.
Trying to grasp the absolute,
and to encapsulate the meaning of life and living.
Wednesday, June 01, 2005
Summer (un)Special
Reverberating Vigor
I have not been writing for quite some time now, and I can sense my neurons are not functional anymore nor even a little less of creativity remains. Two reasons are the culprit, one I have been dormant, again, and two my seven year old pc bid me farewell. Bottom line is, now, there are so many things I want to write and talk about, from anything to everything, considering I have not been very vocal about these things, not even to one. At the nucleus of each brain cells, thus, is a deep inner desire to create a piece of a chronological back-track.
Ranting(s)
My life, since I enter college was a mess. It is how to put something that almost never esteemed. Despite of all the efforts done to revive myself and put things into proper perspective, achieving the desires I have, the goals I set seems almost always elusive juxtaposed with so much contradictions and complexities beyond my grasp. In me I see a picture of an ordinary adolescent, who tries to figure out the meaning of things, to comprehend the impasse and unearth each gist, and to make sense of his world.
Never did I expect that things will become much worse this summer. This summer’s a tragedy. Or to put it in a better (or worse) term a total tragedy. Against odds, I tried to gain my posture back. It never paid off well. Mine was a constant cumulative succession of tragedies and frustrations. A reason I keep to myself is accountable for it, which until now I am trying to fight – like a malignant illness, usurping gradually my vigor and strength – my being. I failed to cope with it, much more accept it. But I am not quite sure if I am really sturdy enough to tolerate it. I grow almost always impatient, as I always am.
I know, years counting from now I will always go back to this point in my life with regret and remorse for I have not capably and productively handled each situation; I succumbed feebly to the inauspicious circumstances overlooking my very own strengths and potentials.
In Mitch Albom’s the five people you meet in heaven, a character named The Blue Man avers “THERE ARE FIVE PEOPLE you meet in heaven. Each of us was in your life for a reason. You may not have known the reason at the time, and that is what heaven is for. For understanding your life on earth.”
If the concept of heaven is real, I am overzealous to get there and find out why I lived and what I lived for.
Not Just Animosity Though
If there were instances during this long summer-break worth to be etched in for a lifetime, it would have to be my holy-week trip at Mindoro, the first few weeks of the internship program (OJT), and the SOCC leadership-training seminar at Batangas.
Vacation starts with a three-day break at Pola, Mindoro, Lucky’s hometown. It was quite remarkable because went there totally un-planned. The decision was something spontaneous. He asked me if I wanted to go with him, I said yes and presto we found ourselves cruising our way to Batangas port. In less than three hours, we are at the port waiting for the vessel to arrive. Funny thing is it is my first time to ride in a vessel, and we ride in a cheapest mode of transportation there is. It is a little less fine though since I got a chance to see and observe people. I might not be very good at mingling with people but having to observe them, and the mobility inside is something amazing.
We arrived there at the wee hours of the morning and Lucky’s folks were caught surprised. That same day we went to the beach, played badminton, watched moriones and visited the newly constructed port. The next day we played badminton, spent time at the town’s fitness gym, and went to the local church. On the third and last day, we toured over the town and went to the beach. Of course not to out-mention there were a lot of foods and ghost-stories. Atop all, riding on a high-speed motorboat and cruising over the mangroves was, by far, the most exciting part.
The internship program was something I cannot be proud of but thankful though, in a sense that I really do not have to exert much effort. Not that I do not want to but it is just that I was facing a very hard time during the summer. The thing is that the OJT required a little less of time since it was really project-based. We are required to produce an output on the educational needs assessment of Taguig & Pateros; a paper on youth development; bills for military benefits, which was eventually dropped; and a survey on the functions of a congressman and performance rating of Rep. Cayetano. Along which, we were required to attend committee hearings.
I spent most of my time with Lucky and Joc fooling around. Our work is eighty percent fun and twenty percent sincerity. Partly, I am accountable in the sense that I deliberately allowed such to happen because I was really not interested anymore. I have this sudden, unpredictable mood swings. At times I am overly excited, and after a while I could be very lazy. I made it clear. But they chose to stay with me.
At the end of the day, I find myself dissatisfied with work. But who could blame me? I am disillusioned. And I am blessed, the work is light and it doesn’t require me to get exposed throughout the day.
Finally, the SOCC Leadership-Training Seminar was something I will treasure. I wasn’t supposed to be the representative because I have plans to quit even though I was enlisted. I insist on Cory or Joyce or any officer for that matter. But all were a failure. So I was the one who attend. And I am glad I did.
The experience was all worth it because it was fun. I found new friends from different colleges and they were all great. At the end I realized, I should have been active long before. I should have attended the previous SOCCs, I might have been better. I remember the old days. And I will try to live out of it, because if there is one thing I learned it is living with the memories of the past is almost living a life of regrets and should have been-might be better now. The thing is seize the most, if not all opportunities that comes along the way. It takes quite an amount but building one’s world starts with it.
I have not been writing for quite some time now, and I can sense my neurons are not functional anymore nor even a little less of creativity remains. Two reasons are the culprit, one I have been dormant, again, and two my seven year old pc bid me farewell. Bottom line is, now, there are so many things I want to write and talk about, from anything to everything, considering I have not been very vocal about these things, not even to one. At the nucleus of each brain cells, thus, is a deep inner desire to create a piece of a chronological back-track.
Ranting(s)
My life, since I enter college was a mess. It is how to put something that almost never esteemed. Despite of all the efforts done to revive myself and put things into proper perspective, achieving the desires I have, the goals I set seems almost always elusive juxtaposed with so much contradictions and complexities beyond my grasp. In me I see a picture of an ordinary adolescent, who tries to figure out the meaning of things, to comprehend the impasse and unearth each gist, and to make sense of his world.
Never did I expect that things will become much worse this summer. This summer’s a tragedy. Or to put it in a better (or worse) term a total tragedy. Against odds, I tried to gain my posture back. It never paid off well. Mine was a constant cumulative succession of tragedies and frustrations. A reason I keep to myself is accountable for it, which until now I am trying to fight – like a malignant illness, usurping gradually my vigor and strength – my being. I failed to cope with it, much more accept it. But I am not quite sure if I am really sturdy enough to tolerate it. I grow almost always impatient, as I always am.
I know, years counting from now I will always go back to this point in my life with regret and remorse for I have not capably and productively handled each situation; I succumbed feebly to the inauspicious circumstances overlooking my very own strengths and potentials.
In Mitch Albom’s the five people you meet in heaven, a character named The Blue Man avers “THERE ARE FIVE PEOPLE you meet in heaven. Each of us was in your life for a reason. You may not have known the reason at the time, and that is what heaven is for. For understanding your life on earth.”
If the concept of heaven is real, I am overzealous to get there and find out why I lived and what I lived for.
Not Just Animosity Though
If there were instances during this long summer-break worth to be etched in for a lifetime, it would have to be my holy-week trip at Mindoro, the first few weeks of the internship program (OJT), and the SOCC leadership-training seminar at Batangas.
Vacation starts with a three-day break at Pola, Mindoro, Lucky’s hometown. It was quite remarkable because went there totally un-planned. The decision was something spontaneous. He asked me if I wanted to go with him, I said yes and presto we found ourselves cruising our way to Batangas port. In less than three hours, we are at the port waiting for the vessel to arrive. Funny thing is it is my first time to ride in a vessel, and we ride in a cheapest mode of transportation there is. It is a little less fine though since I got a chance to see and observe people. I might not be very good at mingling with people but having to observe them, and the mobility inside is something amazing.
We arrived there at the wee hours of the morning and Lucky’s folks were caught surprised. That same day we went to the beach, played badminton, watched moriones and visited the newly constructed port. The next day we played badminton, spent time at the town’s fitness gym, and went to the local church. On the third and last day, we toured over the town and went to the beach. Of course not to out-mention there were a lot of foods and ghost-stories. Atop all, riding on a high-speed motorboat and cruising over the mangroves was, by far, the most exciting part.
The internship program was something I cannot be proud of but thankful though, in a sense that I really do not have to exert much effort. Not that I do not want to but it is just that I was facing a very hard time during the summer. The thing is that the OJT required a little less of time since it was really project-based. We are required to produce an output on the educational needs assessment of Taguig & Pateros; a paper on youth development; bills for military benefits, which was eventually dropped; and a survey on the functions of a congressman and performance rating of Rep. Cayetano. Along which, we were required to attend committee hearings.
I spent most of my time with Lucky and Joc fooling around. Our work is eighty percent fun and twenty percent sincerity. Partly, I am accountable in the sense that I deliberately allowed such to happen because I was really not interested anymore. I have this sudden, unpredictable mood swings. At times I am overly excited, and after a while I could be very lazy. I made it clear. But they chose to stay with me.
At the end of the day, I find myself dissatisfied with work. But who could blame me? I am disillusioned. And I am blessed, the work is light and it doesn’t require me to get exposed throughout the day.
Finally, the SOCC Leadership-Training Seminar was something I will treasure. I wasn’t supposed to be the representative because I have plans to quit even though I was enlisted. I insist on Cory or Joyce or any officer for that matter. But all were a failure. So I was the one who attend. And I am glad I did.
The experience was all worth it because it was fun. I found new friends from different colleges and they were all great. At the end I realized, I should have been active long before. I should have attended the previous SOCCs, I might have been better. I remember the old days. And I will try to live out of it, because if there is one thing I learned it is living with the memories of the past is almost living a life of regrets and should have been-might be better now. The thing is seize the most, if not all opportunities that comes along the way. It takes quite an amount but building one’s world starts with it.
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