Back.

I have been out for quite some time, barely noticing how time flies so swift and tender. Sure thing, I miss gliding my mind on the unadulterated blank sheet. I pine for each moment I used to play with words, creatively and systematically. For it gives me a sense of direction, a sense of being.

Engaged with too many a thing all at the same time could possible suffice for a reason. But if I calculate each time, each moment that passed by, it would inevitably show that some moments were treated idly and inefficiently. Like I used to be, and like what I am remained. It proved difficult to emancipate from the encapsulation in nothingness.

That is what I used to be. That is what I am - a being in nothingness. As Jean-Paul Sartre posits “existence precedes essence.” The significance and meaning of becoming human is a predicate to existence. It is not to be treated as the subject. What one is to become is what one desires to become. The becoming is that which defines the being’s essentiality.

My essence, my being is fashioned by my decisions, by the things that I want to do and the manner I will to do them. Now, defining me is not in itself generalize-able into a single term epitomizing the whole of my entity. It entails a lot of aspect to uncover, a multiple of spaces to fill; for to be human is not to be a singular man, for there is multi-dimensionality in ‘humanity.’ It cannot be reduced into a sheer unified, universal entity.

Blogging and writing, for instance, is just a dimension of my entirety. These propensities are manifestation of my becoming human, which partially define me. Both are not my entirety, yet, they speak of my being, my becoming, and my essence. My development from nothingness to becoming is certainly derived from these propensities, which are decided upon and chosen by the full conscious recognition of my freedom.

Counting Some Blessings
1. Mom has now recovered.
2. Dad got his adaptation papers/working permit approved.
3. I was able to answer competently an almost 20-minute recitation with my professor in Local Government and Development, a much needed to augment my mark for that course.
4. Thesis Defense is over. My group got an A in one of the panelists. Surprisingly, he never asked any question, just recommendation. As regards the other panelist, he conceded that we have a good study but still does not give our mark.